倉-央-嘉-措2019-06-19 16:14:07

網友，請採納一下我的問題吧！！！1。說有一隻北極熊，因為雪地太刺眼了，必須要戴墨鏡才能看東西， 可是他找不到墨鏡，於是閉著眼睛爬來爬去在地上找，爬呀爬呀，把手腳都爬的髒兮兮的才找到墨鏡。 戴上墨鏡，對著鏡子一照，這才發現：哦，原來我是一隻熊貓3。一隻北極熊孤單的呆在冰上發呆，實在無聊就開始拔自己的毛玩，一根，兩根，三根，最後拔的一根不剩，然後他就冷死了。4。從前從前有一隻鳥，他每天都會經過一片玉米田，但是很不幸的，有一天那片玉米田發生了火災，所有的玉米都變成了爆米花！！！小鳥飛過去以後……以為下雪，就冷死了。5。小明新理了發，第二天來到學校，同學們看到他的新發型，笑道：小明，你的頭型好像個風箏哦！小明覺得很委屈，就跑到外面哭，哭著哭著，他就飛起來了。6。蜘蛛愛上了蝴蝶，蝴蝶卻拒絕了它，蜘蛛問：為什麼？這是為什麼！蝴蝶說：我媽說了，整天在網上混的都不是好人．7。夏日炎炎的一天，兩隻香蕉走在路上。走在前面的香蕉突然覺得好熱，他說，好熱哦，我要把衣服脫掉。結果他就把皮給剝掉了。 結果後面的香蕉就跌倒了。然後脫了衣服的香蕉就變成了香蕉幹~8。有一天，三個探險家終於尋找到“希望之谷”，傳說中，只要站在山谷邊大喊心中想要的東西，然後往山谷中跳下去，就會得到滿坑滿谷所想要的東西。於是他們三個決定試看看。第一個是個色鬼，因此他大喊“女人！女人！”往下一跳果真有滿坑滿谷的美女正等著他。第二個是個書呆子，喊了“書書書書書！”然後，跳到山谷裡也得到滿坑滿谷的書。第三個是個優柔寡斷的人，左思右想總是無法決定自己的最愛，過了一個小時以後，他終於下定決心，覺得還是鈔票最有用了，於是他走向山谷邊。一不小心踢到一顆石頭，他罵了一聲“shit！”不料一個重心不穩跌下山谷。9。小明呢，就明天要考試窩，但晚上卻在看電視小明媽媽就擔心地問：書都看完了嗎？明天要考試啊小明就爽快地回答：媽，我看完了。小明媽媽就很開心的讚揚小明：乖，那明天你一定考得很好呢小明哭著說：媽，我是說，‘媽，我看，完了’。10。熊貓深愛著小鹿，表達愛意時卻遭到拒絕。 熊貓大吼～為什麼？這一切都是為什麼？ 小鹿膽怯地說：我媽說了，戴墨鏡的都是不良少年11。有一天小明走在路上！走著走著突然覺得腳很酸！為什麼會這樣呢？因為小明踩到檸檬了！12。漢字當中哪個字最酷？丁字褲（酷）巾”對“幣”說：兒啊。你戴上博士帽，也就身價百倍了。“尺”對“盡”說：姐姐，結果出來了。你懷的是雙胞胎。“臣”對“巨”說：和你一樣的面積。我卻有三室倆廳。13。某日，一個大學老師提問一學生，樹上有十隻鳥，開槍打死一隻，還剩幾隻？學生反問：是無聲手槍嗎？不是槍聲有多大？80-100分貝。在這個城市打鳥犯不犯法？不犯。您確定那隻鳥真的被打死了嗎？確定。這時，老師已經不耐煩了：“，你告訴我還剩幾隻鳥就行了，OK？樹上的鳥裡有沒有聾子？沒有。有沒有被關在籠子裡掛在樹上的？沒有。邊上有沒有其他的樹，樹上還有沒有其他的鳥？沒有。如果有鳥懷孕了，算不算肚子裡的小鳥？不算。 打鳥的人眼有沒有花？沒有花，就十隻。教師已經是滿頭是汗，且下課鈴響，但學生繼續問：有沒有傻得不怕死的鳥？都怕死。會不會一槍打死兩隻？不會。學生滿懷信心地說：，如果您的回答沒有騙人“打死的鳥要是掛在樹上沒有掉下來，那麼就剩一隻，如果掉下來，就一隻不剩。老師當即口吐白沫倒在地上！14。一天，有人經過十字路口，發現一件超級恐怖的事，他發現卡卡西和孫悟空竟然在笑！15。很久很久以前，有一晚，池塘裡有三隻蝦，哈哈哈，一個女鬼放了一個屁死了。16。一個搞生物研究的女外星人來到地球，轉了一圈後，覺得人類基因有不少可借鑑之處，於是她抓了個男人，想把他和關於人類基因的文字資料一起帶回。可飛船體積小，沒法帶他走，資料又過於龐大，不能一次帶完。焦慮之際，飛船的電腦幫助系統道：“這人身上有一根小小的棒子即可解決你所有問題……”這時她才恍然大悟，笑著留著口水對那個男人說：“。。。。。把隨身碟給我！” 。17。有一個陷兒正過馬路，結果不小心被卡車壓癟了，他奄奄一息的時候看了看自己的身體，他說：“原來我是豆沙餡兒的，不是肉餡兒的”18。大哥，你別在摸了！你摸了上面摸下面，毛都讓你摸掉了，這麼嫩的皮，被你摸的都流水了！你讓俺以後怎麼賣？這桃都是新鮮的，您不買就算了！19。從前有隻小羊，有天他出去玩，結果碰上了大灰狼。 大灰狼說：我要吃了你！！！小羊大驚！你們猜，結果怎麼了？結果大灰狼就把小羊吃了。20。從前有個劍客，他人很冷，心很冷，劍很冷，最後冷死了21。從前有一隻老虎在馬路上追一隻鹿！鹿大驚於是越跑越快，最後就變成了高速公路22。有一個西紅柿，被石頭拌了一跤吧嗒摔爛了，又有一個西紅柿吧嗒又摔爛了，還有一個西紅柿吧嗒吧嗒吧嗒吧嗒吧嗒無數個西紅柿摔爛了最後一個西紅柿也摔倒了啊嗒耶！番茄醬耶！23。士兵問連長：作戰時踩到地雷咋辦？連長大為惱火：靠，能咋辦？踩壞了照價賠償。24。一天，三隻小豬為了躲避大灰狼的追趕，而建造了三個小屋。大灰狼不費勁的吹毀了草屋，木屋，磚屋，三隻小豬們拼命的跑，但是還是被大灰狼追上了。三隻小豬絕望地說，你看著辦吧。我們放棄了，隨你怎樣。此時，大灰狼奸笑著，留著口水說：那快告訴我小紅帽在哪裡？25。大象把大便排在路中央，一隻螞蟻正好路過，它抬頭望了望那雲霧繚繞的頂峰，不禁唱到：呀啦索，這就是青藏高原！~~~~我打了很久的，採納一下吧！1 say to have a polar bear， because the snow is too dazzling， must wear sunglasses to see things， but he could not find his glasses， then closed his eyes to climb on the ground， climb up， the hands and feet up the dirty to find sunglasses。 Wear a pair of sunglasses， a mirror to shine， it found that： Oh， I‘m a panda3 a polar bear to stay alone in a daze ice， really boring started pulling their hair， one， two， three， the last one left， and then he cold dead。4 once upon a time there lived a bird， he every day through a corn field， but unfortunately， a fire one day the cornfield， all corn into popcorn！！！ The bird flew past later…… That the snow， cold dead。5 Xiao Ming Li of the new hair， the second day came to the school， the students saw his new hairstyle， smiles： Xiao Ming， your head like a kite oh！ Xiao Ming feel wronged， they ran out crying， crying tears， he would fly up。6 spider fell in love with the butterfly， butterfly refused it， spider ask： why？ This is why！ Butterfly said： my mom said， mixing all day on the Internet are not goodThe 7 summer day， two bananas walk on the road。 Walk in front of the banana suddenly feel very hot， he said， good hot Oh， I want to take your clothes off。 He put the skin to peel away。 Results fell behind the banana。 Then undressed banana becomes dried banana8 one day， three explorer finally find the “valley of hope”， according to legend， just stand in the valley edge shouting what you want， then jump into Valley in large numbers， get what you want。 So the three of them decided to try to have a look。The first is a goat， so he shouted， “a woman！ The woman！ ”There was a jump down in large numbers beauty waiting for himThe second is a nerd， shouted “book book book book book！ ”Then， jumping into the valley has been in large numbers of booksThe third is a person always irresolute and hesitant， think of this way and that is not for them to decide the most love， an hour later， he finally determined， feel or money is the most useful， so he went to the valley edge。 Accidentally kicked a stone， he scolded “shit！ ”But an unstable center of gravity down the valley。9 Xiaoming， will have an exam tomorrow nest， but the night was to watch TVXiao Ming mother asked： books are finished？ Have an exam tomorrowXiaoming readily replied： Mom， I finished。Xiao Ming mother very happy praise Xiaoming： good， that tomorrow you will do a good jobXiao Ming cried and said： Mom， I said， ’Mom， I see，。‘。The 10 panda love deer， expression love but was rejected。 The panda roar ~ why？ All this is why？ The fawn timidly say： my mother said， wearing sunglasses is bad boy11 one day Xiaoming go on the road！ Walked suddenly feel the foot is very acid！ Why？ Because he stepped on a lemon！Among the 12 Chinese characters which word is the coolest？ G-string （cool）Towel “to” money “says： my son。 You wear a doctor cap， also have a sudden rise in social status。”Rule“ to ”do“ said： the elder sister， the results come out。 You are carrying twins。”I“ to ”giant“ said： and you have the same area。 I have 3 rooms two hall。13 one day， a university teacher asked a student， there are ten birds in the tree， shot and killed one， how many are left？The students asked： is the silent pistol？ No gunshots have how old？ 80-100 db。 Hits the bird in this city to violate the law？ Don’t make。 Are you sure that bird was killed？ Determine。 At this time， the teacher was already impatient： ”， you told me a few birds left to go， OK？ There is no deaf birds on the tree？ No。 There is no was shut in a cage hanging in the trees？ No。 There is no other tree， the tree has no other bird？ No。 If the birds were pregnant， calculate do not calculate in the belly of a bird？ Don‘t count。 Human bird have flowers？ No flower， have ten only。 The teacher was already sweating， and finishes class the bell sound， but the students continue to ask： is there any silly not afraid dead birds？ All fear death。 Will not shoot two？ Can’t。 Students with full confidence， said： if you answer no lie “killed if the bird hanging did not fall in the tree， then remains one， if you fall， does not remain。 The teacher was foaming at the mouth and fell to the ground！The 14 day， people pass the crossroads， found a super bloodcurdling thing， he found that Kakashi and Sun Wukong even in laughter！15 a long time ago， one night， there are only three shrimp pond， ha ha ha， a ghost put a fart die。16 a biological study of female aliens came to earth， a circle， think the human gene has many lessons， she caught a man， want to put him back in and about human gene text data。 But its small size， don‘t take him away， data too large， not a band。 The anxiety， the ship’s computer help system way： ”this person has a small stick can solve all of your problems……“ Then she could see light suddenly， smile and keep slobber said to the man：”。。。。。 The U disk to me！“。17 there is a depression， crossing the road， was accidentally truck tyre， be at one‘s last gasp when he looked at his body， he said： ”I was sweetened bean paste stuffing， not the meat stuffing“The 18 eldest brother， you don’t touch！ You touch touch the hair above， let you feel lost， so tender skin， be felt by you running water！ You let me how to sell？ This peach is fresh， you do not buy it！19 once upon a time there was little sheep， one day he went out to play， the results hit the big bad wolf。 The wolf said： I want to eat you！！！ The big surprise！ Guess what， result how？ Results the wolf ate the lamb。20 once upon a time there was a swordsman， he is very cold， cold heart， sword is cold， the cold dead21 once upon a time there was a tiger chasing a deer in the street！ The deer was surprised and ran faster and faster， finally becomes a freeway22 there is a tomato， was stone mix of Bata broken， and a tomato kipper and broken， and a tomato TA TA TA TA TA countless tomatoes smashed。 Finally a tomato fell Ah Da！ Tomato sauce！23 the commander of the soldiers asked： Combat stepped on landmines？ Even grew up as the angry： depend， can do？ Trampled the compensation。The 24 day， the three little pigs to avoid the wolf‘s pursuit， and built three cabin。 The wolf not laborious blow ruined grass， wood， brick house， the three little pigs are desperately run， but was caught up with the wolf。 The three little pigs desperate to say， you do it。 We give up， whatever you do。 At this time， the wolf crafty smile， keep slobber said： please tell me where is the Little Red Riding Hood？25 elephants in the stool Pai Road Central， one of ants is pass by， the peak， it looked to the cloud can not help but sing： ah cable， this is the Qinghai Tibet plateau！ ~ ~ ~ ~

魚小小xx2019-06-19 16:15:00

這是很主觀的問題，有些人覺得很過分有些人覺得只是小事一件。你可以好好地對他說，他這樣做讓你心裡很不舒服，請他不要再這樣了。或許之前你的語氣較重讓他覺得下不了臺，所以說什麼也不承認自己做錯了。試著心平氣和地說，對你和他都好。他尊重你的話會答應的，不是說情侶間應該互相體諒和包容的嗎？

嘿時光雜貨鋪20212019-06-19 16:16:22

如果，他是你朋友，就不會開玩笑，如果那個人把你痛苦開玩笑，那他對你並不關心，是和不是，這個問題，要看那個人決定。

歪格子2019-06-19 16:15:40

因為他把你當成了自己人，覺得你是他最親近的人，才會覺得這件事情很有意思很有趣，他覺得你只是輕輕摔了一下很可愛。如果是你真的摔的很嚴重他這樣就不正常了，對你有失關心是不夠愛你的表現。